Does everyone feel responsible for their sibling's emotional needs?

Many people find themselves taking on a supportive role for their siblings, especially if there were challenges in their family growing up. It's a common dynamic where an older sibling, or sometimes even a younger one, steps in to offer comfort and guidance. This often stems from a deep bond and a natural desire to protect those we care about, but it can also become a significant burden.

Research suggests that approximately 1 in 4 adults report experiencing some form of parentification during childhood, often involving emotional caregiving for a sibling or parent.

See other perspectives

Am I the only one who feels responsible for my sibling's emotional needs?

Am I the Only One?

Is it normal to feel responsible for your sibling's emotional needs?

Is It Normal?

<h1>Is it weird to feel responsible for your sibling's emotional needs?</h1>

Is It Weird?

Why do I feel responsible for my sibling's emotional needs?

Why Do I?

Real stories from the community

I saw them, this bright, smart kid, getting bogged down by all that adult responsibility. …

parentification

i guess this is kinda dumb and probably not even a real confession cos like it's not a big deal right but like sometimes i wonder if i just broke my kid you know my daughter she's sixteen now and um… …

parentification

It’s one of those things that just sits there, a dull ache in the background, but sometimes it flares up and I can’t ignore it. …

parentification

Okay so I’m like, typing this on my phone and it’s probably 2 AM, I should be asleep, obviously, I have that big presentation tomorrow, like, a whole quarter's worth of data, and if I mess this up,… …

parentification

I worry about my daughter, you know, because she spends all her evenings with me, listening to me go on and on about her father and everything, and she's always got the best advice for me, just like… …

parentification

Frequently Asked Questions

Why do I feel like I have to fix my sibling's problems?▾
This feeling often develops when you've consistently been the one to offer support or mediate family issues. You might have learned early on that your involvement helped to stabilize situations, leading to an ingrained pattern of taking on your sibling's struggles as your own.
Is it normal for an older sibling to act like a parent?▾
It's a common pattern, often called parentification, where an older sibling assumes parental duties, including emotional support, for their younger siblings. This can happen in families where parents are emotionally unavailable or struggling themselves, leading children to step into those roles.
How can I stop feeling burdened by my sibling's emotions?▾
Recognizing this pattern is the first step. You can begin by gently shifting expectations about your role. This might involve encouraging your sibling to seek other sources of support or learning to step back from situations that drain you, without feeling guilty for doing so.

Have your own experience to share?

Share Your Story