I'm supposed to be happy here, watching someone's family do their holiday thing, but all I can think about is my dad. He’s alone tonight. Eating dinner by himself in that quiet house, and I just… I can’t shake this almost visceral guilt, like I’m failing a core competency. It’s fucked up, honestly. Like I’m drowning in this obligation, this constant *vigilance*, and I don't even know if it’s real or just some projection of my own goddamn burnout. What the hell is wrong with me?