Okay so I'm like… just up, again, it’s 2 AM, and my brain is going a million miles an hour and I just… need to get this out. Like, I’m a data analyst, right? Numbers, spreadsheets, quiet focus, that’s my jam. Siempre ha sido. But suddenly, my manager, bless his extroverted heart, decides everyone needs to be more "visible" and "leadership-ready." And that means… bubbly. Upbeat. Engaging. Like, I have to PERFORM every single morning stand-up, every team meeting, every goddamn water cooler chat. It’s like, a whole show. And I’m good at it, too, which is the worst part. I can put on this whole persona, this bright, chirpy, "GOOD MORNING TEAM! WHAT EXCITING NEW METRICS ARE WE CRUNCHING TODAY?" thing. And everyone buys it! My manager even praised my "positive energy" in my mid-year review. He thinks I’m actually LIKE that. But inside, I’m dying. Like, seriously. Every single time I have to switch it on, it feels like a little piece of me just… shrivels up. I spend all day "on," you know? Smiling, making eye contact, asking about people’s weekends even though I could not care less about Barry’s new dog. And then I come home and I’m just completely spent. Like, can’t even talk to my roommate, just want to stare at a wall. I used to like my job. I used to be good at it, the actual *work*. Now it’s just… acting. And the thought of doing this for another twenty years, like, climbing the ladder with this fake smile plastered on my face, it’s making me wanna just… scream. Or quit and go live in a cabin. I don't know man. And the worst part is, if I ever let the mask slip, even for a second, I’m worried they’ll think I’m not "committed" or not "a team player" or whatever corporate buzzword they use for "not constantly radiating sunshine." Like, what if being quiet, being analytical, being *me* isn’t good enough? What if my manager’s right and I actually *have* to be this other person to get anywhere? It just feels so… unsustainable. I’m SO TIRED. And I just had a thought, like, what if everyone else is doing the same thing? What if it’s just a whole office full of people playing parts? But then that feels even worse, because it means there’s no escape. Just… more of this. Forever. Ugh. Need coffee. Or like, five years of silence.