Am I the only one who feels guilty wanting a loved one's suffering to end?

Many people experience a profound sense of guilt when they wish for the end of a loved one's suffering, even if it means their death. This difficult feeling often arises from a deep love and compassion, coupled with the immense pain of witnessing someone you care about endure prolonged illness or decline. It's a natural, though distressing, response to a truly heartbreaking situation.

Research indicates that a significant majority of caregivers for terminally ill patients report experiencing complex emotions, including guilt and a desire for an end to suffering, during the anticipa

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Does everyone feel guilty wanting a loved one's suffering to end?

Does Everyone?

Is it normal to feel guilty about wanting a loved one's suffering to end?

Is It Normal?

Is it weird to feel guilty about wanting a loved one's suffering to end?

Is It Weird?

Why do I feel guilty wanting a loved one's suffering to end?

Why Do I?

Real stories from the community

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I see the water, you know, every single day, every day it just sort of… creeps a little closer to the rocks, and I think about the old lighthouse keeper, Finn, who swore he saw it coming even then,… …

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And here this man was, watching his literal house disappear, probably his family's for generations, and there was this… profound melancholy radiating off him, even from across the sand and through my… …

anticipatory grief

Frequently Asked Questions

Why do I feel relief when thinking about their suffering ending?▾
Feeling relief doesn't mean you want your loved one gone; it often means you want their pain to stop. It's a natural human response to wish for an end to suffering, both for them and for yourself, as you witness their decline.
Is it wrong to wish for their death if they are in pain?▾
Wishing for an end to severe pain is not wrong. It's an expression of deep compassion. The situation is incredibly difficult, and these thoughts stem from love, not malice. Many people in similar circumstances have these feelings.
How can I cope with the guilt of these thoughts?▾
Recognize that these feelings are a common part of anticipatory grief. Focus on the love and care you have for your loved one, and the difficult reality of their situation. Allowing yourself to feel these complex emotions without judgment can be helpful.

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