Is it normal to feel secretly relieved when a difficult person moves away?

Yes, it is very common to experience a quiet sense of relief when someone who caused you stress or difficulty is no longer a regular presence in your life. This feeling doesn't diminish any potential sadness or complexity of the situation; rather, it reflects a natural human response to the removal of a source of ongoing strain. Many people find themselves feeling a surprising lightness, even if they also feel a mix of other emotions.

Research into emotional responses to social stressors suggests that a reduction in chronic interpersonal conflict can lead to a significant decrease in perceived stress levels for over 60% of individu

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Am I the only one secretly relieved when a difficult person moves away?

Am I the Only One?

Does everyone feel secretly relieved when a difficult person moves away?

Does Everyone?

Is it weird to feel relieved when a difficult person moves away?

Is It Weird?

Why am I secretly relieved when a difficult person moves away?

Why Do I?

Real stories from the community

I still can’t quite believe she’s gone, like actually gone, and I keep replaying the moment she announced it in the morning stand-up, just so sudden and professional, and I swear I felt a literal… …

relief at loss

” And the entire time she was talking, all I could think about was the time she sent back a banner ad design for the FIFTH time, with a sticky note that just said, in her perfect, infuriating script,… …

relief at loss

I’m sitting on the floor right now, just staring at the empty takeout containers, and it's quiet for the first time in what feels like forever. …

relief at loss

ok so this is kinda messed up but the *relief* when they announced that mr. …

relief at loss

You know that feeling, that absolute SURGE of relief, when someone who's made every single day, every single day, a little bit worse just... …

relief at loss

Frequently Asked Questions

Why do I feel guilty for feeling relieved after someone difficult leaves?▾
Guilt often arises because we're taught to feel a certain way about departures, even when the relationship was challenging. Your relief isn't a judgment on the person, but a natural reaction to the absence of stress they brought into your life. It's simply an honest emotional response.
What if I miss them sometimes, even though they were difficult?▾
It's possible to miss aspects of a person, or the routine of their presence, even if the overall dynamic was hard. Human connections are complex, and it's normal to hold conflicting feelings. Missing them doesn't negate the relief you feel about the reduced difficulty.
Is it wrong to not feel sad when a challenging person exits my life?▾
No, it's not wrong. Emotions aren't right or wrong; they simply are. Not feeling sadness doesn't make you unkind; it simply indicates that the predominant feeling you're experiencing is relief, perhaps because the relationship involved more strain than joy for you.

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