I just... FUCK. First date in like, a year, a real one, not just a quick coffee between therapy appointments for my mom, and I’m in this super fancy place, quiet as a damn library, take a tiny sip of sparkling water, and out comes this BURP. Not a polite little pop, no, a full-on, guttural, honest-to-god belch. Like a truck backfiring. He just stared. I want to die. Is this my life now? Just one mortifying moment after another while I try to keep everything else from falling apart? God.