I hate these networking things. Seriously. My stomach does flips every time I get the invite. Gotta go, though. Senior management, you know? They want to see "executive presence." Whatever that means. For me, it means I gotta turn on the charm, be Mr. Big Shot. Laugh loud, slap backs, pretend like I love talking about golf or whatever rich people talk about. All of it a total act. I’m an introvert. Always have been. My dad, he’d always tell me to "speak up, be heard!" Back in the old country, you don’t get anywhere if you’re quiet. He meant well. My kids, they just roll their eyes when I try to talk to them like that. They’re too American. The worst part is when I get home. My wife, she’s asleep usually. I just sit in the dark for an hour, totally drained. Like someone pulled the plug. I replay every conversation, wondering if I sounded fake. Did they see through me? My parents are getting older, lot of doctor visits, and my oldest just moved back home after college, so there’s that whole thing. And here I am, acting like I’m king of the hill, schmoozing people I don't even like. I just want to do my job, go home, read a book. Maybe listen to some old music. They say it’s about making connections. I make connections alright. Connections to a huge headache and a night of tossing and turning. My boss, he’s always like, "You’re a natural, Mark!" (My real name’s not Mark, obviously.) He thinks I love it. Thinks I’m born for this "leadership role." HA. If he only knew. Sometimes I wonder if they’re all faking it too. Everyone just pretending to be someone they’re not, just to get ahead. It’s exhausting. And I gotta do it again next month. Ugh.