You know that feeling when you look back and see the person you *were*... and it's like staring at a stranger? God, my first year as a lawyer... I thought being a complete asshole, just outright RUDE, meant I was "tough." I saw some — well, *someone* — doing that whole aggressive thing, and I figured, *this* is how it's done. Now, watching these little humans run around all day... the quiet, the sameness... you just wonder, was that all a performative act? A delusion? That me... she was so desperate, so blind. And now... now it's just this. This quiet. And that feeling that I wanted more, *still* want more, and that's just... awful.