I just… I had this moment tonight, right? Like, I was staring at my calendar, which is usually a goddamn war zone of client calls and deadlines and “urgent” emails, and I just froze. Couldn’t even figure out what to do first. And then I realized, holy shit, I don’t *do* anything anymore unless my VA tells me to. My virtual assistant. She literally organizes my entire day, sends me reminders to EAT, for fuck's sake, because otherwise I’d probably just keep working until I passed out. And I’m good at my job, you know? Like, I can run a whole project, manage a team, deal with client bullshit and office politics like a pro. But if she doesn't put "check personal email" on my daily list, it just doesn't happen. It’s not even just work stuff. Like, I’m supposed to renew my passport, right? Been on my "to-do" list for like, six months. But it’s not on my *VA's* to-do list for me, so it just sits there. Gathering digital dust. Or calling my mom back. Or, I don't know, literally anything that isn't connected to a paycheck and therefore doesn't get put into our shared task management system. I’m paying someone to tell me to live my life. How did it get to this? I used to be so organized, you know? Like, back in college I had color-coded binders and I’d plan out my whole week Sunday night. Now I can’t even remember if I took the trash out this morning unless I get a Slack message saying "Reminder: take out trash." And the worst part is I feel this… relief when she assigns me something. Like, *oh, thank god, now I know what to do*. It’s almost like I’ve outsourced my brain’s executive function. What kind of grown-ass professional needs someone else to basically babysit their schedule? What happens if she quits? Or if I lose this contract? I genuinely think I would just… sit in a corner and cry. I'm afraid I've forgotten how to function without someone else telling me what to do. It’s pathetic, I know. I feel like a toddler. A very well-paid, slightly burnt-out toddler.