i dunno why im even typing this really, it’s 2 am and i cant sleep again. it’s just so quiet in this house. like a tomb almost. used to be i was always on a plane or in some hotel in some city, always something going on. meetings, dinners, always talking to people. now… nothing. my kids are grown, gone, doing their own thing. parents are, well, they’re old, sorta fading you know? so it’s just me and this BIG house. too big for one person. i guess i bought it thinking it was like, a sign of success? like, look at me, i made it. but now it just feels like a monument to… nothing. it's kinda creepy honestly. i used to love coming home, even after a super long trip, just to crash in my own bed. but now when i come back from like, even a short business thing – which are few and far between now, btw, they’re kinda pushing me out slowly i guess, not overtly but you know how these things go, like 'we want to give the younger execs more visibility' bullshit – anyway, when i get home, it’s just this… empty feeling. i open the door and it’s always just… quiet. no one here. the cleaners come once a week so it’s not even messy. just still. sometimes i think i hear things, like the kids laughing or my husband watching tv, but it’s just the house kinda settling or something. makes me feel a bit nuts. i mean, i worked my butt off for this. this house, the career, all of it. i always thought like, this was the goal. the endgame. and now that im here, it just feels… weird. like im standing on the wrong side of the fence or something. all my buddies, they’re all still working, or they have grandkids running around, or they travel with their wives. my wife, she… well, that’s a whole other thing. so it’s just me. and this really quiet house. and all i can do is scroll on my phone and wonder if im like, missing something. or if this is just… it. i guess. and if it is, then what? what do you even do then. i dunno. should probably try to sleep. but the quiet is LOUD. and im kinda scared of it.</blockquote>