I feel like I'm gonna get SO much hate for this, but here goes, right? It's like... the thing is, I'm retired now. After, like, thirty years teaching third graders, you'd think I'd be all zen and stuff, just enjoying the quiet, you know? But it's not quiet. My parents are getting... frail, is the nice way to put it, and my kids are grown but still need things, always need something, and my husband is HOME now, all the time. Which is great, mostly. But it's just a lot, you know? Like, the house is never empty. I used to look forward to summer vacation so much, that little bit of quiet when the kids were gone and I could just BE. Now it’s just… on. All the time. So I started having a glass of wine, or two, in the evenings. Just to take the edge off. And then it was three. And then it was, like, half the bottle. And I feel like such a cliché, you know? The bored housewife, even though I worked my butt off for decades. It's just... the thought of not having that little escape, that little buzz that makes everything quiet for a minute, it makes me feel like I can't breathe. And my husband, he's a good man, but he's got this idea of what retirement looks like, all golf and walks and no "excesses." Like he keeps track, I swear. He's not mean about it, just... observant. And I don't want him to worry, or worse, to judge me. He already thinks I spend too much on little things for the house, like, he doesn't get it. So I started... hiding them. It's so stupid. So incredibly stupid. I wait till he's watching TV or already asleep, then I take the empty bottles and I shove them right to the BOTTOM of the outdoor recycling bin. Under all the Amazon boxes and the newspaper. Sometimes I even break them a little, just to make sure they're completely buried. And I know it's not sustainable. I KNOW it. But then tomorrow comes and it's the same thing, the same noise, the same expectations, and I just want that little bit of quiet. And I feel so ashamed, but I also feel like... what else am I supposed to do? What's the alternative? Please tell me someone else gets this, like, I'm not the only one doing something totally bonkers just to get through the day.