i know this is gonna sound BAD but i only date guys who are like COMPLETELY unavailable and it's not even like an accident you know like i actually SEEK them out. i got this one guy in new zealand he's a hoot and then another in like... switzerland i think? he sends me postcards. and it's like my kids are grown my mom's health is like a constant thing and my boss is GIVING me a hard time about my performance reviews so like i just can't deal with someone actually like AROUND all the time you know? it's just easier this way like i can just focus on my flower shop and... whatever. but then sometimes i wonder if i'm just a chickenshit or something ...