plates still warm — ceramic, 8 of them, white with that tiny blue rim. after her comment, "oh, the breadwinner's still here!" during the risotto. 7:17 PM. my hands in the suds, water just-hot-enough. felt like a sudden, mild hypothermia. that old familiar anhedonia kicking in. freelancing, no benefits, never enough, this gig economy, it’s like trying to build a dam with cotton balls. just kept washing. the water running. quiet.