I just… UGH. I can't even believe I'm writing this. It’s not a big deal, really, this is stupid but it's like, just another thing, you know? Another little piece of me getting chipped away. And I can't even complain about it because everyone else has real problems. My kid has real problems. My mom has real problems. I’m just here, the goddamn pillar, holding up everything while everyone else gets to fall apart and have feelings. I don’t get to have feelings. I get to scroll through endless medical bills and reschedule appointments and try to figure out how to stretch one paycheck into three. So yeah, this little thing. It shouldn’t bother me. But it DOES. I was just trying to get through my shift. Retail, obviously. Nothing glamorous. Just the same old grind, smile at people who treat you like you’re invisible, stock shelves, clean up spills. And it’s always busy, always something happening, but today felt heavier. My kid had a rough night, barely slept, and then getting them ready for school was a nightmare. So I'm running on fumes, stomach doing flip-flops from the coffee and no breakfast, and my head just feels… thick. Like I’m trying to breathe through mud. So I’m at the register, and it’s a bit slow, thank GOD. And I pull out my phone, just for a second. Just trying to catch a breath, honestly. And I’m scrolling through that thread about the senator, the one everyone’s talking about, and it’s just so JUICY, right? A total mess, and for a second, just for ONE second, I wasn’t thinking about prescriptions or grocery lists or why the water bill was so high. I was just… somewhere else. Escaping. For like, thirty seconds. And then I hear it. A little “Ahem.” Not loud, not aggressive, just… a clear, pointed little sound. And I look up, and there’s this woman, probably in her 50s, standing there, staring at me. Not smiling. Just… staring. And her eyes, man, her eyes just went straight to my phone, then back to my face. And it wasn’t even what she said, because she didn’t say anything. She just raised her eyebrows, like, “ARE YOU KIDDING ME?” And I felt it. This incredible, hot flush of shame. Like I’d been caught doing something truly disgusting. Like I was a total LOSER. I put the phone away so fast, practically shoved it in my pocket, and just started scanning her items, trying to act like nothing happened. “Find everything okay today?” My voice sounded so fake, even to me. And she just grunted. Didn’t make eye contact. And I just wanted to disappear. Like, it’s not a crime to look at your phone for a second, is it? But the way she looked at me, it made me feel like I was totally failing. Failing at my job, failing as a parent, failing as a person. Like I don’t deserve even ONE minute to myself. It just felt like a punch, you know? Another reminder that I’m just supposed to be available, all the time, for everyone else’s needs. And if I’m not, I’m a JERK. I’m selfish. And it’s just… exhausting. I’m just so damn tired.