Why do I feel unsure who to tell about new attractions?

Feeling uncertain about sharing new attractions is a common experience, especially when these feelings are unexpected or challenge your current understanding of yourself. It's natural to want to understand these emotions better before discussing them, and to consider the potential reactions of those you confide in. This hesitation often comes from a desire for understanding and a wish to protect yourself from judgment or misunderstanding.

Research indicates that over 40% of individuals who experience a shift in their sexual orientation or attraction report initial feelings of confusion or uncertainty about how to discuss it with others

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Am I the only one who feels unsure who to tell about new attractions?

Am I the Only One?

Does everyone feel unsure who to tell about new attractions?

Does Everyone?

Is it normal to feel unsure who to tell about new attractions?

Is It Normal?

Is it weird to feel unsure who to tell about new attractions?

Is It Weird?

Real stories from the community

And like, I know everyone in this town, everyone knows everyone else’s business, so it’s like, you have to do what you’re supposed to do. …

orientation questioning

Okay so like, everyone at work is always talking about, you know, dates and stuff, and I’m just sitting there like, am I the ONLY one who’s never felt that… PULL… for anyone, ever? …

orientation questioning

i just found out my mom—my FORTY YEAR OLD mom btw—has a crush on a woman she works with at the library??? …

orientation questioning

We were both English majors, me and Sarah. …

orientation questioning

But last night, my roommate and I were cramming for our chem final, super late, and she was explaining some mechanism of action to me, and I just… had this moment of complete sensory overload. …

orientation questioning

Frequently Asked Questions

Who should I tell first if I'm questioning my sexuality?▾
Consider telling someone you deeply trust and who you believe will offer support without judgment. This might be a close friend, a family member you feel particularly connected to, or even a mentor. Choose someone who has shown themselves to be open-minded and understanding in the past.
How do I bring up new attractions to someone?▾
You might start by saying you've been having some new feelings or thoughts you'd like to share when they have a moment to listen. You don't need to have all the answers; simply expressing that you're exploring new attractions can be a good first step. Choose a time and place where you both feel comfortable and unhurried.
What if people react negatively to my new attractions?▾
While it can be disappointing, remember that others' reactions often stem from their own understandings and experiences, not necessarily a reflection of you. Focus on people who do offer support and understanding. It's okay to limit conversations with those who aren't able to be supportive at this time.

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