I was holding the baby tonight, finally asleep after hours, and yeah, just staring at him. He’s so tiny, still. And I dunno, suddenly it hit me: what if I’m not around for the big stuff? Like graduation, or his wedding day. This gig economy, no benefits, no sick pay… it’s a grind, man, and sometimes I wonder if I'm gonna burn out before I see him even start kindergarten. Just me, 30 years old, holding my kid, thinking, WHAT if I just… disappear? The thought just hung there, heavy.