i’m supposed to be reading for my lit seminar but i’m just sitting here thinking about how my husband’s kids were telling some inside joke about a christmas present from years ago — they all laughed you know the real kind that makes your stomach hurt — and i just smiled and nodded like i understood like i was PART of it but i wasn’t. i just feel like a shadow sometimes a guest who overstayed their welcome you know... will i ever really belong or am i always going to be the nice lady who lives here now... god i hope i get a better grade on this next paper...