Okay, so this is probably a bit silly, maybe, but it’s really getting to me. Am I the only one who does stuff like this? I work as a personal trainer, you know, gig economy stuff – no benefits, always hustling for the next client. I’m not exactly young anymore, pushing 60, and sometimes I wonder if this is it. My legacy, I guess. Helping people lift weights, eat kale, live "their best lives." But then the gym empties out, everyone's gone home, and I kinda sneak off to the locker room. My gym bag, you know, the one with the clean resistance bands and the protein bars? It’s also got this… secret compartment, I guess. Tucked way down deep. And inside, tonight it was a bag of those cheap, sugary donuts. The ones with the sprinkles. And I ate them. All of them. Just sat there on the bench, in the quiet, when no one could see. Felt a little bit – dirty, maybe? Like I’m betraying all my clients, all the advice I give. All the "eat clean, feel lean" stuff. It’s just… a lot. The constant worry about money, the trying to keep up with trainers half my age. Sometimes I just want something easy, something sweet, something that isn’t about being "optimal." Does anyone else ever just… completely undo all their good advice the minute no one's watching? Is it just me being weak, or is there something more to it? I don’t know. Just sitting here, kind of sticky, feeling a bit sick, and wondering what the hell I’m doing with my life, you know? What if this is all I am? A donut eater, pretending to be a health guru. Feels pretty crummy.