Is it normal to avoid people who have things I want?
It's quite common to feel a pull to distance yourself from individuals who possess qualities, successes, or possessions you desire. This often stems from an unconscious attempt to shield yourself from feelings of envy or inadequacy that might arise when comparing your own situation to theirs. This reaction is a natural, albeit sometimes unhelpful, way our minds try to manage uncomfortable emotions.
Research suggests that nearly three-quarters of adults admit to experiencing feelings of envy at least once a month, often triggered by social comparisons.
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Frequently Asked Questions
Why do I feel jealous of friends who succeed?▾
Feeling jealous of a friend's success is a very human response. It often happens when their achievements highlight an area where you feel less accomplished, triggering feelings of longing or a sense of being left behind. It's not a reflection of your friendship, but rather an internal struggle with your own aspirations.
How can I stop comparing myself to others?▾
Stopping comparison starts with recognizing when you're doing it. Try shifting your focus to your own progress and strengths, rather than observing what others have. Limiting exposure to highly curated online content can also help reduce triggers for comparison.
Is it bad to feel envious of someone?▾
Envy itself isn't inherently bad; it's a natural human emotion. What matters is how you respond to it. If envy motivates you to work towards your own goals or learn from others, it can be productive. If it leads to resentment or avoidance, it might be worth exploring why you're feeling that way.
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