I guess I’m just… saying it. Out loud, finally. My mom passed away a few weeks ago. We buried her, did the whole thing, you know? And everyone was so sad, of course. My dad, my sister, all the relatives. And I was sad too, I think. I cried at the funeral, definitely. But then, after everyone left, and it was just sort of quiet in the house… I felt this, like, lightness. This weird, almost shocking, sense of relief. And I’ve been feeling it ever since, and it’s just eating me up because what kind of person feels *relieved* after their mom dies? It feels so wrong. I mean, I’ve been taking care of her for years. Like, since high school, really. She got sick slowly, so it was always sort of there, always my responsibility. My sister moved away for college, got a job, has her own life now. My dad… he tried, but he’s just not good with that stuff, you know? So it was always me. Doctors appointments, meds, making sure she ate, just… everything. My whole adult life has kind of been built around her needs. I never really went away to school, never got a job outside the house, never really had my own space or my own life, I guess. It was just… her. For so long. And now it’s over. And I feel… free? But that sounds horrible, right? Like I wished her gone, which I DIDN'T. I loved her, I really did. But this feeling… it's like a huge weight just disappeared, like a physical thing that was always on my shoulders, and now it’s just GONE. And I don’t know what to do with it. Or with myself, really. Who am I, even, without that? It’s like, my whole identity was "the one who takes care of Mom," and now that’s gone and there’s just… me. And I don’t even know what ‘me’ is supposed to be. I just feel this weird, quiet, kind of terrifying joy, and I hate myself for it. Is that normal? Or am I just a really terrible person?