I'm hiding in the pantry right now eating a fancy chocolate bar. The good stuff. Not the grocery store kind, this was like twenty bucks. Yeah I know. My kids are outside playing making all this noise and I told them I was "busy." Busy hiding from them so I don't have to share this damn chocolate. Three toddlers. All under five. My own kids are grown thank god but my daughter she's got her hands full so I'm helping out. Again. With her kids. All the time. My parents need me too. Dad's got his memory going and mom needs me to drive her everywhere. It's just non-stop. Always "Mom can you..." or "Grandma can you..." and I just... I can't. Not right now. I feel like a total asshole for this. I really do. This chocolate is so good though. Like melt-in-your-mouth good. I unwrapped it so quiet you wouldn't believe it. Like a ninja. And I'm sitting here on the floor, crouched down behind the cereal boxes so no one can see me through the crack in the door. If one of them found out oh man the screams. The crying. "Grandma you're being MEAN." And then my daughter would look at me all disappointed. Like I'm a bad example. For eating a chocolate bar. Alone. It's just a damn candy bar. Sometimes I just want to lock myself in the bathroom and just... sit there. But then someone always needs something. Always. A drink. A snack. A diaper change. Someone's hurt. My mom needs her meds. My dad's asking the same question for the fifth time. It never ends. Never. And I'm just here. Hiding. With my stupid expensive chocolate. I'll probably feel sick later from eating the whole thing but I don't even care. Not right now. I just want this moment. Alone. Before someone starts banging on the door wanting something. Anything. From me. Again.