So I'm sitting here, 2 AM, staring at this damn ring box. Not even a fancy one, just the little velvet thing, and it feels like a lead weight. I mean, she deserves… everything, right? More than everything. And I'm just… I don't know. I’m pushing fifty, barely, and I keep looking at the house, the car in the driveway, and it’s all… fine. On the surface, you know? Like, we keep up with the Millers next door, their manicured lawn, their kid’s fancy private school. But inside, I’m constantly doing the mental arithmetic. Property taxes, utilities, the HOA fees that just went up again because some old hag on the board thinks the bushes by the common area aren’t sufficiently "stately." It’s a constant, low-level hum of dread. And it’s not just the money, though god, that’s a huge part of it. I've always thought I had a handle on things, a certain… stoicism, maybe? But lately, these waves of just… flat-out exhaustion hit me. I mean I don't even — whatever. I’ll be on the commute, stuck in traffic on the 101, and just thinking, "Is this it? Is this all there is?" And then I think about her, her laugh, how she brightens up a room, and I feel this… this panic. Like I’m going to drag her down into my own personal suburban malaise. She talks about future plans, about grandkids someday, and I just nod and smile, but inside I’m screaming. What if I can’t give her that? What if I'm just… not *enough* for that kind of future? Am I just projecting my own inadequacies onto her potential happiness? Anyone else feel this? This deep, gnawing fear that you're about to make a colossal mistake, not because you don't love them, but because you know you're fundamentally… flawed? Like, you want to build this amazing, stable life for someone, but you're constantly aware of the cracks in your own foundation, waiting for them to show? I look at her and think she could do so much better, find someone who isn't constantly calculating the cost of a new water heater or wondering if his 401k will actually last. Will this just end up as another cautionary tale, a sad story about the guy who meant well but ultimately just… failed?