Okay, so... I’m probably gonna sound like a total jerk here, and I know I shouldn’t even be thinking this, much less typing it out for strangers on the internet, but here goes. Anyone else ever get that feeling where you just… snap? Like, not outwardly, of course. I’m a professional, you know? I’ve sat through enough “active listening” workshops to know how to keep a straight face while my boss drones on about synergy. But inside, my brain just went full office-politics-level cynical, and I feel super guilty about it. It was during church, which makes it, like, EXTRA bad, right? So, this past Sunday, the music director — let’s call her Brenda, because that’s her name — she’s like, mid-thirties, very energetic, always has a new arrangement for everything, which is cool sometimes. But then old Mr. Henderson, he’s 78, been in the church forever, literally. He stands up after the sermon and in his kinda shaky voice, he suggests "Amazing Grace." And it’s like, a classic, you know? A good choice. And Brenda, she just did this… *thing*. It was like a quick little hand flick, not even a full wave, more like a flick of her wrist, almost imperceptible. But it was definitely a dismissive gesture. Like, "Oh, *that* old thing? No thanks." She didn't say anything, just that little flick, and then she immediately launched into some modern hymn nobody knew, complete with projected lyrics and, like, a bass guitar. And I saw Mr. Henderson kinda shrink back into his seat, just a little. And my brain, my brain went straight to thinking about performance reviews and how you have to pretend to be on board with every new initiative even when it’s clearly not the best idea. Like, Brenda's just trying to hit her KPIs for "modernizing the worship experience" or something. And I felt BAD for Mr. Henderson, for sure. That’s the part I feel guilty about. But also, a tiny, TERRIBLE part of me was like, "Yeah, Brenda, you tell 'em. We gotta keep things fresh." Which is HORRIBLE, because it’s church! And Mr. Henderson is a sweet old man! And I immediately felt like the absolute worst person in the world, like I'm already halfway to becoming the cynical old lady everyone secretly rolls their eyes at. Am I the only one who gets these awful, unbidden thoughts? Or is this just… part of getting older and seeing the patterns, even in church? Ugh. I probably shouldn't have typed this. Deleted soon, probably. Just… needed to get it out.