I swear to god I’m gonna get fired for this but like, I just have to say it out loud for once and it’s kinda eating me up, you know? Like I’m a receptionist, right, and it’s my first real office job and everyone here is so… professional, and put together, and I’m trying to be that too, like I really am, I wanna do well and climb the ladder and all that bullshit they talk about in performance reviews but also like I’m still just a college kid basically, you know? And I keep this bag of gummy bears in a hollowed-out notebook, like seriously, a fake book, and it’s so stupid but it’s the only thing that gets me through some of these days, like I’ll be on the phone with some super important client or whatever and I’m just popping a gummy bear in my mouth and trying to look serious and like I’m totally focused and not thinking about how much I hate answering the phone. And it’s not even just about the sugar rush, though that helps when I’m about to fall asleep at my desk, but it’s like this little secret I have, this little rebellion in this super formal office. Like everyone else is drinking their fancy coffee and talking about their investments and I’m over here secretly eating gummy bears like a goddamn five-year-old and trying to look like I know what an EBITDA is, you know? And the other day my boss came over to my desk, and he was asking me something about a report, and I swear to god I almost choked on a cherry gummy because he got so close and I thought for sure he was gonna see it or like, smell it, even, and then that would be it, like game over for my entire career and I'd just be a gummy bear eating weirdo forever. But it’s just… it’s this one thing that’s just for me, and it’s dumb, I know it’s dumb, but it helps me feel like I’m not just this like, cog in the machine, you know? And I know I should probably stop, like I’m gonna end up with cavities or something, and I’m definitely going to get caught eventually, but like, for now, it’s my thing and it makes me feel just a tiny bit like myself in this whole new world and that’s gotta count for something, right? Like I can’t be the only one who does something stupid like this just to get through the day. I really hope I’m not.