Path not taken: You're Not the Only One

I don't know, sort of vibrating on a different frequency than the life you actually have? …

I started trying to find the guys again last month.

Has anyone else ever spent their whole life wondering if one tiny, quiet lie changed the entire shape of who they were supposed to be?

You know that feeling when you’re driving down the interstate and you see your exit, but you just... …

I think I might have made a huge mistake...

I guess I’m just thinking about high school tonight, which is probably pathetic since I’m thirty-eight and haven’t touched a ball in years. …

I’ve been calculating the ROI on my life choices lately, and the data suggests I’ve made a significant tactical error. …

You ever just sit there at 2am and look at your life and want to set the whole thing on fire?

It was a picture of domestic tranquility that felt so distant from my own reality that it triggered a total *emotional dysregulation*. …

am i the only one who feels like they committed a slow-motion crime against themselves... …

I have this travel brochure on my lap, the kind with the bright blue water and the white sand that looks almost fake. …

skipped a whole chapter? …

I think maybe I’ve lived too long to see the light the way they want me to see it.

i think maybe i shouldn't be writing this but its 2am and the house is so fucking quiet it makes my ears ring and i just keep thinking about that tuesday afternoon when i was forty and i was sitting… …

But every time I look at my backyard, I feel this sharp, physical pang of—well, I think a clinician might call it anhedonia, or maybe just a profound sense of misplaced labor. …

I’m 76 now looking at this kid who thought he was a poet but really he was just suffering from a massive case of unrequited limerence, just a total fixation on a girl who barely said hello to me in… …

I am sitting in the cab of this Kenworth at a rest stop outside of Laramie, watching the snow accumulate on the side mirrors. …

I started noticing the change in the condensation on the glasses first. …

I can’t hit the sixteenths in the Elgar anymore because my knuckles are sort of...

like you can actually hear the gears grinding in your head because you're supposed to be typing up some bullshit email about brand synergy but you're just watching this woman in the pottery place… …