Anyone else ever feel like they’re just observing their own life and seeing all the points where things are going wrong and there’s nothing to do about it but just keep watching and I'm 19 and my dad just had surgery and he's not doing great and my mom is there and my sister is there and I'm here at college and I see my friends going home for weekends and I'm just here and I guess I just feel this— this empty spot and a sort of dull ache behind my ribs but also a kind of relief that I'm far away and I don't have to see him like that and I know that sounds awful but it's just how I feel and I guess I just want to know if anyone else ever feels this way— like you’re just a camera watching things happen.