Why do I avoid bringing up things that upset me?

Many people find it difficult to voice their frustrations or concerns. This often stems from a desire to maintain peace, avoid conflict, or from past experiences where speaking up led to negative outcomes. Sometimes, there's a belief that the issue isn't important enough, or that others will react poorly.

Research from the University of California, Berkeley, indicates that suppressing negative emotions can increase physiological stress responses, such as elevated heart rate and blood pressure.

See other perspectives

<h1>Am I the only one who constantly avoids bringing up things that upset me?</h1>

Am I the Only One?

Does everyone avoid bringing up things that upset them?

Does Everyone?

Is it normal to avoid bringing up things that upset you?

Is It Normal?

<h1>Is it weird to avoid bringing up things that upset you?</h1>

Is It Weird?

Real stories from the community

I just kept looking out the window when that guy kept bumping into me, yelling about the bus, and I didn’t say jack. …

anger suppression

From her cold stew. …

anger suppression

I was a junior architect, felt like I had the world by the tail then, even though I was just barely getting by, living in that tiny apartment above Mrs. …

anger suppression

It’s like a kind of perceptual fading, I think the psychologists call it habituation, where a constant stimulus just drops out of your awareness. …

anger suppression

I just cleaned the kitchen again it’s the third time this week and it's not even Wednesday yet every single day every day I find myself doing it and I just quietly do it because what's the point of… …

anger suppression

Frequently Asked Questions

What happens if you never address things that bother you?▾
Consistently avoiding difficult conversations can lead to bottled-up emotions, which might manifest as irritability, resentment, or stress. Unresolved issues can also strain relationships over time.
Is it bad to keep my feelings to myself?▾
While it's healthy to choose when and with whom to share, habitually keeping all feelings to yourself can prevent problems from being resolved and might make you feel isolated. Finding healthy outlets for expression is key.
How can I start talking about things that bother me?▾
Begin by identifying one specific, smaller issue you'd like to discuss. Choose a calm moment and a person you trust. Focus on expressing your feelings using 'I' statements, rather than blaming, to make the conversation more productive.

Have your own experience to share?

Share Your Story