I feel like a horrible person even typing this out, but I have to get it out somewhere because it’s eating me alive. I just turned 28, which feels ancient sometimes, and I just finished college. Took me forever, right? Most of my friends were done years ago, getting real jobs, buying stuff. But I finally did it. And now… now I don’t know what to do. It’s about my brother, Leo. He’s 26, and he needs a lot of help. Like, all the time. Since I was little, it was always about him. His appointments, his needs, making sure he was okay. My parents are great, don’t get me wrong, but there was just so much to do, and I was the "responsible one." The one who helped out, who understood. So I just… did it. I put my own stuff on hold, always. Going to that party? Oh, Leo has therapy. Want to try out for that play? Can’t, Mom needs me to watch Leo. It just became my whole life, you know? Like, my identity was "Leo’s sister." And for so long, I didn’t mind. I loved him, I still do. He’s my brother. But then college happened, and I got a tiny apartment near campus, and suddenly I was alone. Like, really alone. And it was WEIRD. I went to this party a few weeks ago, and someone asked me what I was into, what my hobbies were. And I just… froze. My mind was blank. All I could think about was Leo, what he liked to watch on TV, what his favorite food was. I couldn’t even answer for myself. It was so embarrassing. I just mumbled something about reading and walked away. The other day, my mom called, all excited. She was like, “Oh, the new accessible van is here! Come over and see it!” And I felt this… dread. This HUGE wave of dread. I just wanted to stay in my apartment, watch a dumb movie, and not have to think about anything or anyone else for five minutes. And that’s when it hit me. I’m SO TIRED of it all. I feel like I missed out on my own life, like I’m just starting to figure out who *I* am at 28, and it’s because I was always so busy being Leo’s sister, the good daughter. Is that awful? Does that make me a terrible person? I feel so much SHAME. I just wish I knew what to do next. Everyone says "find yourself," but what if there’s nothing there to find? What if I'm just… an empty space where a person used to be, filled up with someone else’s needs? I graduated, I should be happy, I should be excited for what’s next. But all I feel is this heavy, ugly secret. And I just want to run away sometimes, just disappear and start fresh somewhere no one knows about Leo, or my family, or any of it. Is that even possible? I don’t know.